Did I get lost?

Once upon some time ago I decided that I am like soooooo done with the education in Estonia. So bearing that in mind I started to think were my life was leading me. I took some time off everything and just paused. Well the decision I made led me to here, in Austria, where I’m currently living and studying.

A lot of people are asking me why here and I thought to answer everything all together and this is probably why You are reading this post.

Like I stated before it all started with “where am I going with my life” thing like a normal person in their twenties would ask themselves. All I knew was that I really wanted to ski.

If some of you are familiar with the location of Estonia and that it has no mountains, you can imagine that everything was and would be a bit complicated to do from that location. So I guess I kind of always knew that I would move, cause one thing I knew, I wanted to ski. But to be stuck in only skiing is also a bit pathetic. I mean some people are successful businessmen with also being one of the best athletes in the world and then there is me who just works retail and skis.
Yes it was working for a while, but I guess time to make some chances and risk. So that is why I decided that it is time to move on and go forward.

Why Austria? Öhhhh please stop asking me that. I can give you few points what led me here, but there is no “I have always wanted to live here kind of thing”

So point one is its location. If you know anything about alpine skiing then you also know that this is THE PLACE TO BE. I mean in Austria they eat, sleep and shit (sorry) skiing. Honestly I still sometimes forget that they know their skiing when I discuss something with somebody. As an example I will demonstrate on of the most common conversations that I have with the Estonians

“So what do you do?”

“Umm, well I try to focus on alpine skiing mostly. It is kind of like my profession”

“Oooooooooh. You like to go down straight and faaaaaast ehh!”

“Actually, I concentrate more on technical ones. You know, like slalom?”

“Oh, you can do that here in Estonia?” *demonstrates some wild wiggling movement that is supposed to familiarize skiing*

(Here ladies and gentlemen, I always get carried away cause how is this even logical- I can go straight down the hill but doing slalom is so unbelievable that is has to be demonstrated to know we are talking about the same thing)

And also Lindsey Vonn. Ghhhhh... I’m sorry girl, I love your skiing but I am so tired of hearing that for sure I want to be like you cause this is the ONLY NAME IN SKIING ESTONIANS KNOW. Excuse me, I want to be me.

Okay, got a bit carried away but lets continue.

If you want to know how conversations on the same topic with the Austrians go:

“Ohh, you like skiing. So cool. What level are you? Did you see Hirscher last season dominating the world cup. Maaaaan that guy is on fire....”

and then there is me just staring my eyes wide open thinking like “duuuuuuuuude, I freaking love you now”

So until now we have realized that Austria is a good location for a skier to be. But so is also Italy and Sweden and Norway. So Why Austria? (Again)

Lets say it easy. Money. We all know there is no such thing as free stuff. Somebody still has to pay even if it is not you. Talking education in Estonia- it is “called” free for full time yes. But you pay for it with your health, time and (honestly) sane mind. It is expected for you to ONLY study and for the parents to pay for living, food etc. Well sorry but I don't have that option. When I was in Estonia I was working, training and doing full time studies and I can say that I only remember maybe 15% of my life cause I had so much to do just with only working and studying that my brain shut down. And I am still recovering.

I hope you all realize that this is just one university that I have experienced (although have heard same thing about others).

Anyways with that I came to the conclusion that I do t want to do full time and far far far far away from there.
So in Estonia part time education costs about 1000-2000 euros per semester for the subject that I wanted to study. And the same price for full time studies in Italy. So that's a no go.
And there it is again, my saviour Austria. In here all education is just under 400 euros (except private). It doesn't matter if you do part or full time. I was pretty much sold after that. Now the only thing was to find what and where to study.

English. I mean that’s a language I can understand. And because I don't do German yet (guys, chill, already studying). Must say it was really hard to find full English program in bachelor. Most of the world provides masters in English. So next factor was “what am I good at and what do I want to do?”.

It pretty much came down to two options with location: Salzburg and Krems (near Wien). Both of these program are focused on Tourism and Leisure management. This is what I am currently studying and it has been wonderful. So where did I decide to haul my ass to? KREMS. Because of the wine. Haha no.
But I really must say that this was a good decision. This place is so cute, it really reminds me of Estonia. I guess my reasons for being here and studying are not so “OMG THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY DREAM” and more like “I will scout the lands for better options than this” but It seems to be working out still and I have been liking it so far. Ask me in three months and then I can answer again. As a side note: Things I miss the most. Buckwheat, sour cream, normal not powder milk, daaaaaaark bread and taking out money without any fee.

Oh and the people. Love you. Talk soon.

Usalda inimest Iphone-iga!

Pidevalt ringi reisides tekib nii mõnigi kord selline olukord, kui on vaja väga pissile joosta. Vähemalt minu puhul osutub selline vajadus raskesti lahendatavaks. Seda sellepärast, et reisin suure pagasiga. Minu pagas koosneb vähemalt neljast ühikust (see termin on tekkinud aastatepikkusest pagasipakkide loendamisest ning ülelugemisest), millest üks on suuuuuuuuuur suusakott, siis hiiglaslik riidekott, mis kaalub ka tonni, seljakott kõige põhilisega ning mäekott saabaste ja muu taolisega. Seega olukorras, kus tõesti peab jooksma pissile, tuleb leida muu lahendus kui pagasi kaasa vedamine.






Üks sellistest lahendustest on teise reisija abi palumine. Aga kuidas leida sellist inimest, kes ei oleks koos su pagasiga hiljem kaduma läinud? Vot see on omamoodi trikk. Usaldus on kahepalgeline asi. Sa võid küll leida, et inimene on usaldusväärne, kuid mitte teda usaldada ning ka vastupidi. Nagu ma ka enne mainisin, siis olen reisinud oma elus üsna palju. Või noh, palju ühe üheksateistaastase neiu kohta. Kasvõi hetkel istun ma lennujaamas ja vaatan tõtt mõne araablasega viimased neli tundi. (Kes, tänu jumalale, on kaugel teises nurgas). Ma ütlen ausalt, et ka väheke judinaid tekitavad teised minus. Seega olen enda pagasi mässinud ümber käte-jalgade kinni, nii et eelmainitud mitte mingi hinna eest minu varaga ukse poole ei saaks astuma hakata. Kuna kellaaeg on ka veidi hiline (ometigi on ju öö normaalsetel inimestel), siis teeb minu peakene vahepeal sellist nokkivat liigutust ja silmakesed lausa vajuvad kinni. Vaatepilt on, ma kujutan ette, üsna naljakas. Nimelt on mu üks jalg pistetud läbi kotisanga, teine risti esimesega, Käed põimuvad läbi jopede ning pusade ja telefon on tihedalt taskusse peidetud. Väiksem kott raha ja dokumentidega on üle õla, et vältida igasugust identideedivargust.






Te võite pidada mind seetõttu veidraks, kuid ma mainin, et olen näinud kuidas täpselt sellises olukorras inimestelt midagi minema "libistatakse". Maailm on kuri. Tuleb lihtsalt ette näha kuidas sellele vastu hakata.


AGa nüüd ma jõuan oma jutuga tagasi algusesse, et kuidas tõesti vajaduse korral oma pagasit turvaliselt maha jätta. Ma ei heieta mitte kordadest, kui ma olen seda ise pidanud tegema, vaid olukorrast, mis toimus just hetk tagasi ja mis mind üleüldse selleks postituseks inspireeris.






Kuidas valida siis inimest kes teravalt silma su pagasil hoiaks? Lihtne. Tuleb leida selline kellel on käes Iphone või Macbook. Viimane on küll küsimärgiga. Ma pole veel kindel milline neist reaalselt töötas.


Igastahes selgitus minu avastusele: kõndis siin hommikuste-lendude-ootajate juures üks keskealine meesterahvas, kes tundus olevat mures. Silmanurgast jälgisin ka mina seda veidrat olevust enese ees ning ei pööranud suuremat tähelepanu talle. Tüüp jätkas oma edasi-tagasi tammumist päris pikalt. Ütlen ausalt, et isegi ei mõelnud, mis võiks olla tema mureks. Tõmbasin hoopis taskust telefoni, täpsemalt Iphone 4s-i välja ning sättisin äratust, et mitte oma lennukit maha magada. See mul ka õnnestus, kuid hetk hiljem märkasin suurt musta varju ning vaatasin kartlikult üles. Mures meesterahvas lükkas oma kohvri mulle nina alla ning tegi käte-jalgadega selgeks, et tal on vaja õue suitsule kangesti minna. Endiselt šokis, et keegi minuga juttu tegi, noogutasin viisakalt umbkeelsele türklasele ning juba nägin teda reipalt ukse poole marssimas. Üritasin siis saada asjale pihta, et kuidas just mina nii kaheteistkümnest kandidaadist õnnelikuks väljavalituks osutusin ning mängisin üldse detektiivi. Ümberringi vaadates ei leidnud, et ma kuidagi teistest erinev oleksin või kuidagi välja paistaksin. No eks ma uurisin aina edasi. Asi ei saanud olla minu välimuses. Kohe kindlasti mitte: Koduuksest väljudes mainiti, et ma näen välja nagu pomps. (Kes ei usu, küsigu mu parimalt sõbrannalt) . Seda sellepärast, et pagasisse mittemahtuvad riideesemed tuleb kõik selga panna. Seega see polnud võimalik versioon olukorrast. Hakkasin vaikselt jälgima inimeste tegevust ja olekut, kuid sealgi ei leidunud midagi teistsugust olevat- lääbakil olid kõik, istudes oma nutitelefonides ja aina klõbistaded.


Järsku oli kõik selge. Kujutage korra ette, kui teie ees istuksid inimesed, näppides oma telefoni, siis kuidas valida, milline neist on varganäpp ja milline mitte? Loomulikult vaata kui kallis on tema telefon! Ammulisui siis kissitades vaatasin ja lugesin üle kõikide telefonide margid ning mul oli õigus. Mitte ühtegi Iphone mu ümber!


Ei no tegelikult on see valik loogiline ka ju: natuke hiljem tuli mulle meelde, et sellel hetkel lebas mu arvuti laadides põrandal asjade kõrval. Kuigi mu vana niru macbook pro oma katkise ekraani ja lagunemisnähtudega ei ole just kõige esinduslikum, kuid suur valge näritud õun sinna peale on ikka lajatatud.


Ka mina ilmselt usaldaksin neiut Apple toodetega. Sest kuhu ta ikka minu kolaga minema hakkaks, kui endal juba õunad kotis ;)










Edit: Sain isegi tänutäheks Maša ja Karu shoksi! :)

Here and there: summer has passed again

I am not going to give a long introduction today. There is no need for it because we all know that summer of 2015 has passed super-quick. As I haven't posted anything this summer this post is going to sum my summer up pretty well. Although I just promised not to make a long intro, I still need to explain some stuff that I can not express through pictures and videos. (You can always skip the following part :D )

In the beginning of summer I offically moved out from my childhood home and moved to another city. ( Now I have to travel 2,5 hours to get to see my lil brothers :( ) Fortunately my living situation in Tallinn could not be better :) ( Living with best friends is da bomb! )

Also I started a job in a photography shop and oh boy.... I have learned and experienced so much more from photography world than ever before and I absolutely love it. My intrest in taking pics and experiencing the world though camera has returned in a bigway. So probably from now on there will be less talk and more pics. I certanly hope so!

As a lot of you have asked me what I will be doing this year, I though, you know what, I might aswell tell everyone together. And suprise-suprise not going to school this year! With last three years being hell-like on me, I need to gain my strengh and motivation. (Acctually just strengh, because I have tons of motivation) BUT have a year to decide between three subjects that I have chosen. (I would like to still keep them a secret for now). Until next year!

Dam-tara-tatataaaa! Aaaand I have started modelling. Well at least a bit cause I still have this problem with others taking my pictures (I need to be the director of things or else feel super-uncomfortable. I just have to be the boss :D )
But stepping out of ones' comfortzone might have good results. (You will see in a bit)

 And thats it for now. Enjoy my summer!
(Ps! I'm kicking myself already for the quality of photos, but unfortunately my gopro and now (also) my camera are still out of business. Can't ask much from a phone camera!)

Hope to write again soon!

OHHHHH and  HERE WE GOOO:

 Explanation for this: I had trouble with my ankle while I was in Italy. Unfortunately there was a heatwave going on and this was the only way to keep swelling down :D

Baltic Cup 2015

On seljataga (peaaegu) üks pikkpikk nädal.

Eelmisel laupäeval suundusin siis kogu oma kolaga Soome ning esmalt üritasin sõita Tahkol mõne slaalomisõidu, kuid nüüd olen jõudnud ikkagi samale järeldusele, mis enne: ei mingit slaalomit mulle! 

Kuid kui taas edasi Pyhäle Balti karikale sai sõidetud, siis muutus mu halb tuju kohe paremaks. Igaaastane super g treening mõjub mulle nii. :D 

Kuna sel aastal on kiirusalades suur areng olnud, siis ootasin kindlasti paremat kui see, mis kätte anti.

Nimelt tegin võistlussõidus tohutu vea, mis mulle ajas kohe kätte maksis. Lendasin hüppest suusad risti ning oleks äärepealt otse väravasse sõitnud. Mingil imelisel kombel suutsin seda aga vältida. Eriti õnnetuks osutus see, et viga juhtus olema lamedal osal ja hoogu seetõttu enam tagasi ei saanudki. 

Tuli leppida oma 9nda kohaga.

Samal päeval toimus, aga ka teine võistlus, mis koosnes tehtud (äpardunud) super g sõidust ja ühest eelseisnevast slaalomi sõidust. 

Imekombel komberdasin rajalt läbi neljanda ajaga ja tõstsin end alpi kahevõitluse lõpptulemusena 5 kohale.

Järgmist päeva ootasin ma juba eestis istudes, sest tegemist oli suurslaalomiga!!!

See aasta on seda lihvitud nii kõvasti, et mulle on hakanud see täitsa kinnisideeks saama. Lihtsalt nii meeldib! ja areng on ka olnud tohutu. Võrreldes slaalomiga on gs väga heas seisus ning iga sõiduga muutub järjest paremaks.

Esimene sõit küll veidi ebaõnnestus, kuid teine tundus väga sujuv ja täpne. Kokkuvõtteks sõitsin end 5ndaks üldkokkuvõttes ja 4ndaks juuniorite arvestuses.

Kokkuvõttes oli gsi teine sõit ka ainuke täiesti korda läinud sõit sel balti karikal.

Eile ja täna toimus fis võistlus slaalomis ning mõlemad ebaõnnestusid, kuid homme on veel üks võimalus end realiseerida. Loodame, et suudan lõpuks kiiresti mäest alla ka slaalomis saada.

Ahhjaaaa! Nägin päikesevarjutust ka! Päris huvitav oli :)

Ciao! :*

Where am I going with this?

These last few weeks have been really bad. Nothing seems to work out for me and I see people around me reaching their dreams while I feel like I'm in a hole with no way out.
But sometimes we really need to remind ourselves why we have chosen the paths that we have and do we keep pursuing our dreams.

Last four years have been a lowpoint for me and trying to get out of this cycle is hard. Even if a lot has improved this year, a lot has also moved out of place. For instance I'm struggling to find balance between school and training, because everytime I happen to get a chance to go to school I seem to not find time for trainings and if I'm somewhere training, I am not in school.
But even if I feel like I haven't improved as much as I could, I keep on going and find a way to get to my dreams.
Other thing is showing my improvement which is actually even tougher. I don't know for what reason I can't give all out in competition.
In trainings, everyone can see my improvement, but I have so much trouble bringing this out in the competition. So it's a thing to work on for the future.

A thing that makes me so happy is that I can support my closest ones around me. Even if I'm not physically in Vail right now I'm cheering for them anyway. Yay!

Lots of people have asked me what I'm going to do next year as I'm finishing high school in the end of June. I have decided to take a year off to see where I can reach in skiing and to really thing about future ahead. I am probably going to travel between Italy (where my team is at) and Estonia a lot and I am also taking a year of to regain my wanting to study (these last 12 years have really burned me out)

Right now I have encountered a small problem with my back, but I'm positive that this will be resolved quickly and I can be in good shape for the Junior World Championships soon. I will try my very best to do good runs.